Wearing a Kilt to a Funeral: Choosing Respectful Highland Wear Options

Funerals are one of those occasions where people tend to worry a lot about what they should wear — and if you’re someone who regularly wears a kilt, the question becomes even more touchy.

After all, you want to show respect. You want to look put together. And you definitely don’t want to feel like you showed up dressed for a ceilidh when everyone else is there for a solemn occasion.

The short answer? Keep it tasteful and subdued. The goal is to show respect and dignity while not drawing undue attention to yourself.

You may wonder then if it isn't just better to leave the kilt at home. However, you don't need to go that far. Wearing a kilt to a funeral is not inherently disrespectful. Quite the opposite. 

Unlike us American kilt enthusiasts, many Scottish men reserve the kilt just for special occasions and that includes funerals. 

You do not necessarily need to wear all black like modern Western funeral attire. Properly kitted out with tasteful accessories, the kilt can exude respect. If you are wearing a clan tartan that message is reinforced. It's like you are intentionally representing your entire family and ancestors for the occasion. The kilt implies tradition, timelessness and a sense of continuity, even in the face of death. 

Now we do feel it is a good idea to make sure the immediate family of the deceased are aware you will be wearing a kilt. And if you ask and they say "no" then you don't do it. In most cases, they will be fine with it. 

This is even less of a concern if you knew the departed more personally. If the person who passed knew you as “the kilt guy,” or if Highland wear was part of your shared culture, family traditions, pipe band involvement, etc., then wearing a kilt may actually be even more meaningful to everyone present.

Remember that your presence, taken on as a duty of honor and love, is a gift to everyone else. Or at least it can be. Wearing what some might call “the sacred dress of your ancestors” is a solid way to honor someone who has passed. It can carry real meaning.

Tartan:
Any tartan will technically do. However, if you have one, consider wearing something in the muted or weathered color palette.

Jacket:
A darker tweed or black Argyll is best.

Leathers:
Black is preferred. Black ghillie brogues or simple dress shoes are best.

Sporran:
Stick to a simpler sporran such as a black day sporran or hunting sporran. While you may feel inspired to dress up a bit as a show of respect, funerals are generally not a place for dress attire. Dress sporrans, like Prince Charlie jackets, are really meant for celebratory evening occasions. 

And this begs the question about metal accessories. If you can, opt for antique- or bronze-finish choices for your sporran chain, kilt pin and cufflinks. 

Between the accessories and the sporran the goal is to look elegant, not "blingy."

Necktie:
Black is always the safest option. However, as with other occasions, your tie can tone with a color in your tartan (see our full Highland Dress guide). If you wear a colored tie, choose a solid-color wool tie over a pattern. We recommend against silk for this occasion. 

Honestly we do not recommend this (unless you're a Goth and so was the departed). While it might feel like an appropriate move, it actually comes off as trying too hard. 

• Do NOT go regimental. Maybe that's your norm but this is a serious occasion where even the smallest risk of an embarrassing gaff is not worth the risk. Just don't.
• Keep items in your sporran to a minimum. This has a few advantages. First, a bulging sporran doesn't look as nice. Second, it is more comfortable and better for your back (you may be standing around for a long time).
• Leave your cell phone in your car. There is NOTHING more embarrassing than having your phone buzz during a funeral! 
• Finally, as a gentleman it is it honorable of you to carry some extra tissues for anyone who might need them.